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PG&E Song, or Write the Check and Shut Up

Few appreciate the musical qualities of the hedge trimmer. PG&E logo Playing music takes an immense amount of practise with a variety of gardening tools.

PG&E Song (click to hear this lovely MP3 waltz) by Carol Denney February 6, 2001
PG&E is your friend
don't skimp on the money you send
give us your dough though you're
shivering and cold and then
next month just send it again

PG&E needs your money so bad
even though you gave them all that you had
your little check doesn't go very far
when you buy an election it costs you an arm
and a leg write your check and shut up

Carol Denney and Richard List's Bakesale for PG&E netted $1.27 for the beloved utility if you're confused we can open your eyes
come to MacDonald's and pick up some fries
pick up a placemat and read till your eyes cross cause
Governor Davis has got some advice for you
turn down your thermostat shut off your lights
and put on some more socks and shut up

your little check is a joke don't you know
we need 8 billion before we pass go
we gotta make profits it's like a disease
we're the landlords we're Wall Street we're oil companies
we want you to be quiet and suck down the sleaze
so that we can get rich and keep you on your knees...
get a clue write the check and shut up

if you didn't cash your stock options in time
don't come to us with your bitching and crying
our parent company's doing just fine
and we're tired of the way all you ratepayers whine
and you'll send all of your money to us over time
so get used to it - oh, and shut up

(updated for the San Bruno explosion in September of 2010)

out in San Bruno it's clear that we care
orange-jacket workers are seen everywhere
we blew up your houses and blew off your hair
but it's simply a part of the old wear and tear
and eventually we'll get round to repair
and we're sorry to give our shareholders a scare
you can't prove its our fault so shut up

(additional verse for the Japanese workers at the Fukushima nuclear plant)

Japanese workers who clean up the spill
know good old TEPCO will pick up the bill
radioactivity doesn't kill, well
at least not at first so just shut up and chill
and you might want to knock back an iodine pill
and you know there's at least time to make out your will
and it's not GE's fault so shut up

go on and buy up our wires and our lines
we got you right where the sun never shines
you think you owe cause we've messed with your minds
and you think it's your fault if the spot market climbs
caused you warmed up the soup or read past your bedtimes
and you'll pay til you're down to your last little dimes
cause you're used to it aren't you shut up (chorus)

...There is an exec named Glynn,
Who did his own company in,
Then got a big bonus,
Leaving others the onus,
No wonder, his shit-eating grin...
- Anonymous

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